Confession

April 08, 2014  •  Leave a Comment

I Have a confession.

I'm not perfect.

I met with a sweet and wise friend this morning.  I talked through some of my anxiety and shared my heart.  I shared that the prayer request I have been asking others to pray for is"That I would trust God - unconditionally."  This really sums up what I want, how my heart beats, and what I know deep down is true.  I want to believe God even when things don't seem good to us.  But - He is good, no matter how we feel.

As I said these words, do you know what her response was?  "Is that attainable?  Will you ever have a life, here on earth, that trusts God unconditionally?"

Ummmmmmm......excuse me?!  That is my goal...that's what I want...and I think that's really what God wants too....right??

I felt like I had the wind knocked out of me. "No."  There will always be something I am holding on to.  Something I am scared to let go of.  Something I cannot trust God with.  It may be big, or small.  Consuming my mind or I may not even recognize it is happening.  But the reality - I am imperfect and on this side of Heaven, I always will be.

Don't get me wrong, I think God DOES want these things for us.  But this goal is one I won't be able to check off my list.  It is something to work towards, even though we will never arrive.  We all start somewhere.  What is something you are trusting God for TODAY?


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