Every now and then, I (Mike) will write something on the blog. This piece is for all the future grooms out there.
Of course one of the first things you do after proposing is call all of your friends and family to tell them the details. I will never forget what one of my groomsmen told me after I shared the good news, he said something to the effect of:
"Mike, I've never understood why so many good male leaders become entirely passive in the planning of the first act of their new family. Mike, you get two great ceremonies in your lifetime, your wedding, and your funeral - these two days say more about what you stand for than any other days in your life. Make them count."
Those words cut me straight to the core. At this point in my life, I couldn't have cared less what our wedding color palette was - let alone know what that meant. It made me cringe to spend $11.95 on a bridal magazine - which I didn't even know was a category of magazines. What exactly are center pieces on tables? How do I spell boutonniere again?
My wise friend's point was not that I had to make all of these decisions for us, but I needed to be actively engaged in the process and particularly to the point of having opinions and talking about them.
If the miracle of a wedding is that two families enter and three exit, then it only stands to reason that a good husband will care about the day that miracle takes place and what it says about who they are.